Final Fantasy: Sharks

No That Is Not An Upcoming Square Enix Title

Look, I understand that Final Fantasy is a Fantasy game.  It’s right in the title.  That makes it hard to miss.  Given this, I am willing to suspend my disbelief in a lot of situations.

Sharks are teal blue?  That one’s easy to work with, because teal is not far from a realistic grey.

I'm a Shaaaaaark!

I'm a Shaaaaaark

Mermaids are pink?  OK, sure.  I don’t know what color real mermaids are, anyway.

All the mermaids are identical

All the mermaids are identical

Mermaids are suspicious of my characters’ ability to breathe underwater.  This is fair.  My party possesses “oxyale” (Magic Fairy MacGuffin #802), with which mermaids may not be familiar.  (I mean, you can’t even buy the stuff.  You have to find a pirate who’s kidnapped a fairy and sold her into slavery to a desert caravan… look, it’s complicated.)

How can YOU talk underwater?

How can YOU talk underwater?

But come on… White Sharks…


I'm a Shaaaaaark toooooo

…are purple?  They’re not… white?

(This post is dedicated to my wife, who was willing to buy into all the pseudo-scientific claptrap underpinning Mass Effect, including the mysterious Element Zero (Space MacGuffin #2193) – with its ability to produce both the titular gravity distortions, and make unborn humans psychic – until they mentioned running a “negative current” through a device.  “Negative current?!  There’s no such thing!”  Welcome to our household of nerds.)

P.S. – I almost forgot my obligatory FF8 teaser!

A gun? That's also a sword? e_e

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